The Latest: Wednesday 10 March 2010
 | Martin + Osa, we hardly knew ye | FailAfter months of rumours, the official word at last is that American Eagle is shutting down its Martin + Osa brand. There seems to be a market segment best defined as "Ho-Hum Basics", with plenty of players therein, but apparently this town wasn't quite big enough for them all. M+O was one of those brands where we'd look for things like v-neck cotton sweaters, while making the usual rounds of Lands' End, L.L.Bean, etc. In recent months they sent us a lot of discount coupons that we never felt inspired to use, and apparently others felt that way as well. Not sure what the takeaway lesson is from all of this, except perhaps that playing it too safe can be as dangerous as taking a chance on something different. Or, unfortunately, that selling vulgar logo-covered crap is where the real money is.10.mar.2010 style |
 | Sure, blame Hugo. | FailSo Danny Glover is joining up with the Workers United labor union in calling for a boycott of Hugo Boss at the Oscars. Turns out everyone's favourite design house with a dark militaristic past is about to shut down a Cleveland plant, laying off 375 workers. A noble sentiment, we suppose, but our reactions to this were: (1) Those American-made Boss suits came from f**king CLEVELAND??? (2) Didn't this lightweight moralist used to hang out with noted Nazi Mel Gibson? (3) Aren't there a lot more clothing companies we could pick on for never making anything in the USA in the first place? and (4) Well, screw it, we're going to retaliate by not watching the Oscars... oh, wait, we were already on that plan.07.mar.2010 style |
 | Who's the douche? You're the douche! | FailWe've been monitoring Land's End Canvas for a while, to see how they position themselves vis-a-vis their obvious competitors in J.Crew and the upcoming Alex Carleton L.L.Bean Signature line. And we're concerned. As previously observed, a successful campaign employs model photography that a prospective buyer can relate to, and we're not sure we want to be associated with people like this guy (see photo). We could totally picture him making this gesture at himself in the mirror every morning before hopping into his leased BMW and heading out for another day of brown-nosing and f**king up the financial system.05.mar.2010 style |
 | Nautical trend sinks in record time | FailIt seems like every spring the so-called "nautical trend" is pushed on us, defined increasingly loosely now that everyone who's going to buy blue-and-white horizontal stripes and Sperry Top-Siders has already done so. This year it seems to be steaming towards the proverbial iceberg in record time—Urban Outfitters' "nautical" page has no discernable theme whatsoever, and Martin + Osa's "Riviera Shawl Cardigan" (left) was marked down 40% almost as soon as it hit the site. You're never going to be as cool as Cap'n Crunch, so don't try to dress like the man; therefore in place of the latter we'd recommend the less stilted and more universally wearable Lands' End version (right).03.mar.2010 style |
 | Dress Code WINSpotted on Failblog.org, an epic dress code sign for Republic New Orleans. "No Affliction. No Ed Hardy. No Christian Audigier. No Exceptions." We were already on that policy, now can we just enforce it everywhere else? |
 | Oh I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK... | FailAs previously observed, the metropolitan woodsman trend is not only dead, it's long since buried and overgrown with weeds. Which makes it all the more baffling that French Connection UK is just now rolling out a Big Hairy Unwashed Man-Blog And Collection™. We understand that Britain is in a different time zone from us; we just didn't realize that the time difference is three years.26.feb.2010 style |
 | ASOS Holland Esquire knock-offs | BuyFor anyone who dug those Holland Esquire overcoats but not the cost nor the limited availability, British etailer ASOS offers a couple of really similar styles at $150 and $170, the former complete with the orange contrast trim of the original. The brown one is way too boxy, so set aside $30 for tailoring as well. Our experience with ASOS branded stuff is that compares to H&M in quality: if you understand going in that it's not going to last more than a couple of seasons, then by all means go for it. This stuff might all be out of style by then anyway, right?24.feb.2010 style |
 | Pastel Denim. Et Tu, Hugo Boss? | FailPastel denim. (Sigh.) It sounds like a punchline, doesn't it? As if white denim wasn't bad enough, now we have this, rolled out by everyone from Uniqlo to Hugo Boss. OK, maybe there's an artistic vision here that just escapes us: perhaps this is like heavy metal bands wearing women's makeup in the 80s, hoping to travel through gay and come out the other side. Or it could be a reference to European continental style with the coloured pants and sport coats. Or (and we're going with this one) maybe it's just a really stupid f**king idea.22.feb.2010 style |
 | Audi A1: So close, and yet... | WaitRegular readers know that we like European compact cars around here; the challenge of cramming sport, efficiency, utility and affordability into a small package seems to bring out the best in top designers. Last week Audi rolled out its long-awaited A1, designed to compete with rival BMW's Mini, and we're all kind of stunned that it won't be offered with quattro all-wheel-drive. Audi had a chance here to do something completely unique to the segment by offering its signature feature, but instead left the car to compete on looks alone. And it looks OK, but there's nothing compelling one to choose it over the Mini or the Fiat 500 or (if you live in a civilized part of the world) the magnificent Alfa Romeo MITO. |
 | Vancouver and native art: traditional modernity | BuyThe visual identity of the Vancouver Olympics is all about native art, from the colourful logo based on an inukshuk (or more technically an inunnguaq due to its humanlike form) to the mascots and medal designs (shown) that reflect various facets of First Nation culture. Without pretending to understand the finer points of native history, we've always loved the clean, iconic look of Inuit and Haida art in particular. Something about the smooth simple lines and basic colours seems utterly contemporary, much like the African traditional art that was so effectively co-opted by Brancusi and his modernist ilk. It's not intimidating nor expensive to begin collecting, either; find a small gallery and start with what you like. We recommend Inuit Art Zone and Spirits of the West Coast. |
 | Opening ceremony: Britain Takes Gold | BuyWe've long maintained that it's impossible to look stylish in a puffy parka, and what better opportunity to test the theory than an Olympic opening ceremony in the middle of a Canadian winter. Over 80 countries marched in various uniforms, and sure enough, none of the dozens of stuffed-pillow looks were at all appealing. The clear winner for us was Great Britain, whose hoodies and tailored outerwear offered a strategy that works in the real world: instead of putting yourself into a down-filled tent, start with a coat that gives you some shape and then layer the s**t out of it working inwards. (Getty photo)15.feb.2010 style |
 | Mailbag: Discount Online Boutiques | WaitLando writes: "Are the prices on discount boutique sites like gilt really that good?" Answer: The prices on these sites are usually great, but other problems can render them unusable. Gilt Groupe in particular seems to be oversold in terms of its member-to-available stock ratio, and jumped the shark about a year ago, when the douchebag population figured out that they could jump in at the beginning of a sale, put one of everything into their cart, and then leisurely decide what to keep. Everyone else sits around for 45 minutes waiting for a desired item to inevitably change status from "in members' carts" to "sold out". Their selections are generally pretty good, but using the site has become a frustrating game played by people who have no life. RueLaLa on the other hand is a lot better in terms of stock, but they have fewer good sales for gents... including some truly horrendous lapses in judgement (coughEdHardycough...) |
 | How to be an aging rockerMost old rock stars have a real problem working out how to reconcile their age, their place in history, and the fact that they jump around and scream for a living. But The Who really nailed it with their Super Bowl style. Roger Daltrey's great striped blazer, scarf and wireframes all refer directly to the band's 1960s Mod roots, but in a completely contemporary way, with a little dose of Austin Powers revisionism. We'll overlook an unfortunate Pete Townshend buttoning strategy that lead to an occasional display of pasty British gut. It wouldn't be the halftime show without a wardrobe malfunction. (AP photo) |
 | GQ Magazine demonstrates why we do this s**t | FailWe've written about this endlessly already, but the paucity of genuinely useful men's style magazines continues to amaze us. Case in point: GQ's 2010 "Most Stylish Men" feature is headlined by a shirtless Johnny Depp, a shirtless David Beckham, Tom Brady's beard stubble and Robert Pattinson's hair. Now, regardless of which team you play for, we have to ask: how this any of this is at all useful to anyone? We turn to style experts for advice on improving how we present ourselves. If all they can tell us is to have a young person's hairline, or to be a ripped athlete or movie star, well, the percentage of us who can take that advice is probably rather low. This is disappointing because GQ has the resources to evaluate and present comprehensive buying guides to literally dozens of items each issue. It's no doubt easier to instead put together a scrapbook of celebrity photos like this, strewn with a few sentences that reiterate the obvious, but since when is easier better? |
Special ReportValentine's Day Gift Advice from StyleMayvin | BuyValentine's Day is fast approaching, and instead of just taking our usual wild guess at what dames want, someone here had the idea that maybe we should just, you know, ask them. So we prevailed upon one of the most fashionable women we know, T.Strong aka StyleMayvin, to throw us a bone. She kindly took time out from her busy schedule of publishing and TV appearances to help us out.StyleMayvin: "Most men probably won't believe this but honestly, women are really quite simple to understand and overall, pretty easy to buy gifts for. More about quality than the price tag, ladies love to create memories around the gifts we receive and in that vein my advice to the Gents is to do just that. Take her to a cozy Bed & Breakfast and surprise her with a beautiful heart pendant. Although it may sound a bit cliché, make it memorable by having it engraved with a special message. The basic 'I Love You' simply won't do unless it's the first time you've said it BUT be sure she feels the same or it could make for a very interesting weekend. Maybe the message could be something quirky that only the two of you know and understand... either way, the ambience coupled with this thoughtful gift trumps roses and chocolates anyday." Shown left to right: Return to Tiffany Mini double heart tag pendant [$100], Sweetheart Heirloom Locket from Blue Nile Check out StyleMayvin this week to see our pick for gents, and every week for insights and commentary on women's fashion. | |
 | Hugo Boss F/W 2010: braun mit grauen, jawohl!The typical Hugo Boss fall/winter palette ranges from Spinal Tap Smell The Glove Black to extremely dark greys, but they will get all giddy and surprise us now and then with slightly lighter greys and browns. This year's runway show was pretty much as expected, but we particularly liked seeing browns and greys put together in both the men's and women's collections. While it's almost always safe to combine black/white with a colour or a colour with a neutral, there's something fundamentally sophisticated about pulling together warm and cool neutrals in the same range and making it work. (Sorry, no Brownshirts jokes this time. Too easy.)03.feb.2010 style |
 | Mailbag: The Toggle Menace | FailAmanda M writes: "My husband wants to buy a toggle coat, but I think the hood looks dumb on a grown man. Am I right here?" Answer: It's not the hood that bothers us. It's the toggle itself, which looks like crap when the coat is unbuttoned... and how often are you really going to button all of those things? Also, the rapid rate of contagion for this accessory suggests that we're looking at a fad that will look dated just as fast—absolutely everyone has jumped on this bandwagon, so now we have toggle coats, toggle sweaters, toggle loafers, and (see photo, which proves we're not s**tin' you) a toggle scarf. Seriously, what the f**k? Next year we'll look back at this trend with the same fondness we now hold for H1N1. |
 | John Boehner is the opposite of cool | FailWe've heard Obama's speeches described as "liberal porn", but if they are, then dear God why does the televised State of the Union always include a reaction shot of House Minority Leader John Boehner (R-Ohio)? If the speech is a naughty video, then this is the clichéd bit where they cut to the creepy dude's face at the worst possible moment. Besides, the last time we saw a bright orange chemical tan like this, it was on MTV in an Ed Hardy shirt instead of slouching in an ill-fitting suit and too-small button-down collar. |
 | Craig Ferguson's style: don't try this at homeCraig Ferguson was the best thing on late night TV even before NBC started thinning the herd, and his wardrobe is a good example of how who you are has a real bearing on what you can wear. He starts with strong suits (we particularly endorse his John Varvatos collection) but after that, the execution is the kind of thing only he can get away with: he never buttons his coat, his shirt has a pocket, and he wears skinny ties. None of this would work on most of us—particularly most 47-year-olds—but on a tattooed ex-punk drummer from the U.K. turned self-effacing clown, it really rocks. Context is key. (Take note, urban lumberjacks of New York.) |
 | Just Say No to 80s denim | FailA.P.C.'s New Standard Jean is aptly named; it really is the workhorse selvage denim for underfed trendy types. Unfortunately the spring/summer 2010 collection brings a so-called "washed blue", which borders on pastel. Now you kids out there, you might not have seen this before, so we want to warn you against going down this road. Those of us who were around in the eighties know this all too well. It's a slippery slope that leads to severely tapered legs, high waists, quite possibly pleats, a label that reads "Z.Cavaricci", and ultimately to "mommy jeans". Don't buy into this; in the end it will bring you only sadness.25.jan.2010 style |
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